it feels like there’s this weight on me, when I walk, when I sit, when I sleep, all the time. It won’t go away. my anxiety is ripping me to shreds. I can’t muster proper emotion, everything is just dulled and blurred until I accumulate too much and it comes out in the form of a panic attack or breakdown. my hope for everything is diminishing with each passing moment.
I want to do something utterly reckless. this weekend I will get catastrophically drunk and do what the fuck I want. I’m sick of feeling like a ghost. I want to feel like a fucking person again.
